Concern is better than worry. Concern is life-affirming if used correctly. Worry is draining. Worry drains you and it drains those around. It steals your energy and is exhausting to those that surround you. The concern is external in many ways. Concern has a less internal residence in your emotional house.
“Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.”
– Leo Buscaglia
Concern can stand outside of the issue being observed that worry does not process. Concern allows you to see an issue that is in front of you, to set the majority of the emotion. Worry, on the other hand, personifies the issue at hand. Worry takes the issue deep inside your body. Then worry, like a fine guitarist, plucks the strings of your emotional guitar.
If I’m concerned about my teenage child or I’m worried about my teenage child, the results inside the body are different. It is no secret that a calm mind makes better decisions. But, the connection between a distressed body and bad decisions is often overlooked. And it takes an adroit mind to sort the modern-day world. Not that the modern world is horrible, it has outrun or physical and mental systems.
A Layer Cake of Worry
This is where you insert the modern culprits. The media, social media, traffic, bureaucracy, forms, rules, debt, divorce, etc. No one thing is responsible for the worry. Stack them on top of one another and you have a layer cake of worry
Worrying and concern travel together, but worry does not have a conclusion it spins on itself over and over again. A simple test you may want to use is to ask yourself every day, “Am I concerned about my work or do I worry about my work?” “Am I attentive to ____________, or am I worried?”
Kind of Mellow
Fedor Emelianenko (Fedor) is a Russian heavyweight mixed martial artist, sambist, and judoka. I loved watching him fight, direct, smart powerful. One powerful moment I recall was before one of his fights. I will do my best to recall the essence of the moment.
Fedor was sitting in his locker-room straddling a bench. Fedor was playing cards with another person, I assume his trainer. The announcer commented on this unusual pre-fight activity. In asking Fedor about the causal approach he replied, and I paraphrase, “The preparation is done, all that is left is to fight.
Turn Down the Worry
Here is the lesson. If you worry, turn down the volume of the worry by taking small action in the correct direction. It needn’t be large. Small acts, infinitesimal acts, are interpreted as action. Your mind and body respond in a positive way to correct action. This begins to prove concern is better than worry.
Buscaglia is correct, worry fixes nothing, and steals your future. Fedor is correct also, be prepared and you only need to act when it is time.
Summary: Take a small act in the direction of removing worry, and then prepare. The first act relaxes your mind and body into thinking things are moving in the right direction. The second part is the full-on Zen. Be ready and be in the moment.
Let’s make that concern is better than worry idea even smaller, three words
Small action, preparation.
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KRIS WILDER
Kris Wilder is a martial artist based in Seattle Washington. He has authored many martial art books, including the classic, The Way of Kata. Making no apologies for his obsession of Football he can be found telling any who will listen about the nuances of the Canadian Football League.
The fear of failure is a powerful sensation. Maybe it shouldn’t be so.